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Parenting: North Korea vs. South Korea!

Kim Yumi

Today we’d like to share a video by Kim Yumi, a North Korean defector and speaker at the 2025 Oslo Freedom Forum, titled “Parenting: North Korea vs. South Korea!”

In the video, Kim draws on her own experiences to raise a vivid picture of the hardships North Korean mothers face. She contrasts the endless cycle of washing and boiling cloth diapers in freezing conditions with the ease of disposable diapers and better childcare resources in South Korea.

Kim, who was born in Haeju, Hwanghae Province, escaped to South Korea with her family of eight in May 2023. She now resides  in Seoul and works to raise global awareness about North Korea’s dire human rights situation.

You can watch more of Kim’s videos about life in North Korea @kimyumitv.

Hello, this is Kim Yumi.

Today, I’d like to share my experiences of raising children in both North and South Korea. I’ve raised two children myself, so I want to talk a bit about what that was like.

When I gave birth and raised my children in North Korea, we used cloth diapers made from cotton fabric. Every morning, mothers had to wash them, boil them in water, hang them to dry, and repeat the process every single day. Washing diapers was simply part of daily life. But when I came to South Korea, I was amazed—there was no diaper washing at all, and suddenly it felt like I had so much less work to do. The diapers here come prepackaged and ready to use. You just take one out, put it on, and throw it away after use. I remember thinking, “Wow, you can just throw it away? That’s incredible.” I thought to myself how fortunate mothers here must be.

In North Korea, I raised both of my children this way—washing diapers every morning, boiling them, hanging them outside to dry. Summers and autumns weren’t too bad, but winters were freezing cold. I remember blowing on my hands while washing diapers in icy water. Most households couldn’t use washing machines because electricity was so unreliable, and using one could even get you reported for “wasting state electricity.” So nearly everyone washed by hand. In winter, after boiling the diapers, I had to hang them outside, where they would quickly freeze. It was heartbreaking.

But in South Korea, things are completely different. There’s formula milk, breastfeeding support, and diapers that absorb so well that babies can stay dry and comfortable. In North Korea, if you didn’t change a diaper quickly, the poor absorption could lead to skin problems. Here, though, the diapers keep babies comfortable, and the fact that you can just throw them away after one use is something unimaginable in North Korea.

In North Korea, mothers washed dozens of diapers every single day. Babies would eat, then soil themselves, then eat again—and the diapers would pile up endlessly. All of it had to be washed and boiled by hand. Here, you simply throw them away, and I thought, “This is real happiness.”

Another difference is how babies are carried. In North Korea, mothers almost always carry their babies on their backs—feeding, soothing, and putting them to sleep while working. Here, I noticed mothers use strollers instead. My niece, for example, sits calmly in a stroller, and if someone tries to carry her on their back, she doesn’t like it. I told her, “You are so lucky.” In North Korea, because babies are carried on their mothers’ backs all day long, some children’s legs even became misshapen from the constant pressure before their bones were strong enough.

In South Korea, babies ride in cars and strollers from the moment they’re born—something unimaginable back in North Korea. Only wealthier families could afford strollers, while most mothers had to carry their babies on their backs all day while also working in the fields to feed their families.

As I film this, my mother-in-law is sitting nearby, saying, “You’re saying things that don’t even need to be said. North Korea hasn’t changed at all since when I was raising my children. Even now, mothers still wash, boil, and hang diapers, just as they did decades ago.”

Here in South Korea, being able to simply use a diaper once and throw it away feels like such a blessing. Raising children here is so much easier and so much happier.

Today, I shared with you some differences between raising children in North Korea and South Korea. In North Korea, mothers are still raising babies in unhygienic, outdated conditions—like living in the 1970s or 80s. Here in South Korea, seeing formula, disposable diapers, and washing machines made me realize just how happy mothers and children can truly be.

Raising children should be filled with joy, not daily struggles for the most basic needs. Yet in North Korea, countless mothers still sacrifice their own health and comfort just to give their children the simplest care. Every time I see a child in South Korea sleeping peacefully in a clean diaper or riding safely in a stroller, I am reminded of the countless North Korean mothers who can only dream of such things.

I believe that one day, North Korean mothers will no longer have to choose between survival and their children’s comfort. One day, they too will raise their babies in warmth, dignity, and peace. Until then, I will continue to share these stories—not only for the mothers who are still enduring these hardships, but for the children whose futures depend on change.

Because every child, no matter where they are born, deserves a childhood filled with love, comfort, and hope. And every mother deserves the chance to give them that.

Kim Yumi
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